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the ex factor

Have you ever pursued a new relationship with the intention of remaining friends with your recent ex? If the situation didn't turn out as peacefully as you'd hoped, you're not alone. When an intimate bond is shared between two people - even after they've gone their separate ways - it's difficult to transform personal familiarity into a not-so-personal friendship. When packing your figurative bags to leave a relationship, it's a bad idea to try to tuck "friendship" into the secret compartment in your suitcase. It's not the best way to find closure and it'll cause the sincerity of any new relationship to be questioned. Staying friends with your ex is a behavior that speaks volumes about your intentions - without you ever having to say a word. .

You say he's just a friend, but once the love, sex and emotional attachments have been created, he can never be "just a friend." Once the two of you agree to participate in a close partnership, the deed is done. Unfortunately, there's no "undo" button in relationships.

Memories in the corner of your mind will always remain. No matter how hard you may try to keep your feelings and your actions contained, it's not an easy task to chuck memories - especially fond ones. So, laughing and hanging out with your ex means leaving the door open for the possibility of the past to recur. No matter how you try to rationalize the situation, the truth is, if you're hanging on to the past, you're just setting the stage for future relationship drama. .

Experience is the best teacher and understanding the issue of propriety is an important lesson to learn. Sure, if this was a perfect world, being friends with a past love and having your new partner be OK with it would work out just fine. But in reality, no one is truly all right with their significant other staying close to an ex-lover - no matter what they may say. .

Finding closure is important when you're attempting to pursue a new relationship. While your intentions may be honorable in trying to continue a friendship with your ex, in the end, it just looks like you can't let go of what used to be. -jamana jamison

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